Thinking Differently About New Year’s Resolutions

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The New Year’s resolution is such an interesting, inspirational concept. The fact that we’ve institutionalized a specific time of year to be introspective and reflect on how we lived our last 12 months of life is a pretty incredible thing — definitely an institution to respect and make a priority as we ring in 2013. Identifying which things in our lives were good and which things could have been improved should be top-of-mind when the clock strikes its respective 12:00 AM across the globe on January 1st, 2013 and signifies the start of a brand new year. I’ve always felt that a “resolution” may not be the most effective use of the insights we glean from reflecting on our last year. I’ve always felt pressure to do more things, or different things, or change my life trajectory in a significant way with each list of resolutions I’ve written. In 2012, it was “learn a new language,” in 2011 was “read at least 30 books,” and 2010 was “get a job that doesn’t suck.” I’ve always felt compelled to make a firm decision to either do a new thing or break some terrible old habit. To wit:

res·o·lu·tion

/ˌrezəˈlo͞oSHən/

Noun

  1. A firm decision to do or not to do something.
  2. A formal expression of opinion or intention agreed on by a legislative body, committee, or other formal meeting, typically after taking…

To be fair, this word does not necessarily mean to make a decision about doing a new action, but I feel as a global society we pressure ourselves to acquire as many valuable skills (whether for work, life, or otherwise) as we possibly can. Alternative learning concepts are booming in the web-space and continue to gather supporting communities and huge traction all over the world (check out these examples: Skillshare, Udemy, CodeAcademy). Achievement and success are universally desirable; we all want to live up to our own expectations. We’ve got one life, right? Because of this, we’ve attached a connotation of “new and different’ to the word resolution. Unfortunately, 88% of New Year’s resolutions fail. Human brains have trouble processing just one major life change, and who really only has one New Year’s resolution? Because the area of our brain devoted to willpower is also responsible for several other key functions (like, you know, short-term memory and making sure you don’t say something dumb to your inlaws), asking it to be responsible for the 18 new things we want to learn on January 1st is a bit too much for our poor prefrontal cortex. I pose to you this question. Why must we “do or do not?” Why not try to improve upon the foundations of what we built last year? Why not “develop” instead of “resolve?” Or, resolve ourselves to develop? I propose a permanent, from-now-until-the-world-actually-ends, New Year’s resolution: continual self-development of skills. Improve your foundation and focus on things you are good at instead of trying to do new stuff every year. Bang away for 10,000 hours learning how to code if you love computer science. Spend time developing your personal brand online by actually writing and posting to your blog. Research, practice, fail fast, and try again. Become a subject matter expert on something you are passionate about and want to be good at — focus your limited available time and energy on becoming amazing at 3 things you love instead of competent at 10 things that seem like “good ideas at the time.” Does this mean you should never learn anything new or pick up a new skill? Absolutely not! But there are reasons that passions last a life time. Devote time to focus on those, instead of learning to pole vault (even though admittedly pole vaulting is pretty cool) this year. Become inspired by the idiosyncrasies of your favorite sport or understand the subtle differences between micro-genres in your favorite area of study. I guarantee there will be more return on your investment and you will live a fuller, more passion-driven life. Tell us what you are planning to improve for yourself in the comments and thank you so much for joining us on this journey into 2013!

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Sakis Koukouvis
Sakis Koukouvis
11 years ago

Thank you Clair. I wish the best for the Scoop.it team

Clair Byrd
11 years ago

You are so welcome. Happy new year!

Sieg Holle
Sieg Holle
11 years ago

Well thought out Nudge to make something happen using your own free will. thanks -a happy and prosperous 2013 to you.

Clair Byrd
11 years ago
Reply to  Sieg Holle

Thanks Sieg! Glad you found value in this piece. Best of the year to you. 🙂

Terheck
Terheck
11 years ago

For 2013, I want to improve…myself 😉

Clair Byrd
11 years ago
Reply to  Terheck

Great! Best of luck in 2013!

Diane Wright
11 years ago

I hope to rekindle some of my past talents that I have allowed to lapse. It can be a case of use it or loose it but with the right focus I am sure some of my more creative talents will return. So can yours – or new ones you have not discovered yet.

Clair Byrd
11 years ago
Reply to  Diane Wright

Diane, glad to hear you are revisiting talents of your past. Would love to know more.. care to share? 🙂

Sharla
Sharla
11 years ago

Scoop.It has been a great addition and looking forward to many, many more Scoops in 2013! Upon reflecting on your article, unfortunately i have felt most of my past resolutions were made only to be broken, which is inherent to human nature. This year I resolve. . .http://catnipoflife.wordpress.com/2012/12/28/free-write-friday-14-resolve/ I do hope you visit catnip and the links to other writings. Happy New Year! “See” you in 2013!

Clair Byrd
11 years ago
Reply to  Sharla

Glad to hear you are taking a new look at how to create resolutions, Sharla. Best of luck with your efforts in 2013.

Leonardo Martins
11 years ago

Cool Clair! Enormous and great 2013!!! Thanks -> Leo

Clair Byrd
11 years ago

Thanks for reading Leonardo and happy new year to you!

eric roberts
eric roberts
11 years ago

hi it took a long time to get there but you are right in what you say. I am fed up with shooting off at tangents i am going to concentrate on a few things this coming year,similar to what you suggest. Happy new Year to you and the Scoopit team Eric Roberts

Clair Byrd
11 years ago
Reply to  eric roberts

Awesome to hear, thanks for reading and best of luck in 2013. 🙂

Richard Parslow
Richard Parslow
11 years ago

It’s not so much about ‘willpower’; it’s more to do with defining worthwhile, SMART goals and planning how to achieve them. Neuroscience also tells us that our goals are our most powerful motivators. When you define a goal, you form a mental image of what the world will be like when you achieve that goal. As you work, you continually compare the current world-state to the internal model: when there is a match you receive an endorphin boost – a direct pleasure response in the brain. As professional athletes and coaches we know the importance of using a goal-oriented approach… Read more »

Clair Byrd
11 years ago

Wow, great thoughts Richard. Love what you have to say.. and while I haven’t personally experienced Goalscape, I’m sure it is a lovely tool to help people set and achieve goals.

Tracey
Tracey
11 years ago

Just as a point of reference, the selected font is difficult to read. You may want to make it darker.

Clair Byrd
11 years ago
Reply to  Tracey

Hi Tracey! I’m so sorry you had trouble with the font — can you tell me a bit more? The way it displays for me is normal black on white. -Clair

Michal Sadowski
11 years ago

The problem is not laziness. The real problem is abundance and distraction it brings along. We can go to so many places, pursue so many different avenues, consume so much mind-blowing content that we keep dropping the ball.

And picking up a new one.

And dropping it.

And so on.

My resolution for 2013 is to make things come together more and allow myself to get pulled in all kinds of directions less.

eisde
eisde
11 years ago

I like it! for me this is done by living in the moment more, seeking God more and generally sloowing down and being more delebert in what I Do DO!

Clair Byrd
11 years ago

Really interesting perspective, Michal. Have you discovered anything that is helpful for preventing this distraction and being pulled in many different directions? I’d love to share your thoughts with the community here.

Michal Sadowski
11 years ago
Reply to  Clair Byrd

I find insight meditation a great help (here’s a free guide I use to move ahead in practice: http://www.urbandharma.org/pdf/mindfulness_in_plain_english.pdf

Other than that:
– seek focus in everything you do
– engage in one thing at a time, try to multi-task as little as possible
– don’t set too many goals but seek to get better at everything you do
– avoid common distractions (email, TV, texting), especially while working

VanAllen
VanAllen
11 years ago

Thanks Clair for Scoop and your work. Thanks for your thoughts with which I tend to agree and for this reason I have never set out to make specific and probably, for me, unrealistic NY resolutions but have rather had a feeling that I should improve on what I know I can already do or have done. I don’t like setting myself up for failure!!

Clair Byrd
11 years ago
Reply to  VanAllen

Good thoughts! Thank you for reading and happy new year.

Cheryl A.
Cheryl A.
11 years ago

I’m a passionate believer in life-long learning and feel that the blog makes a strong point when it states that additional knowledge doesn’t always mean learning different things. New learning can mean developing greater expertise whether it is improving one’s level of mastery of an existing skill or increasing understanding of a concept. May your New Year be bright!

Clair Byrd
11 years ago
Reply to  Cheryl A.

Totally agree, Cheryl. Thanks for weighing in with your opinion and happiest of new year’s to you. 🙂

Ed Burckhardt
Ed Burckhardt
11 years ago

Great article Clair, on my way to becoming “amazing at 3 things I love”. Have a great New Year!

Clair Byrd
11 years ago
Reply to  Ed Burckhardt

So glad to hear it, Ed. Best of luck in 2013.

takini8
takini8
11 years ago

My resolutions are always the same- read more, write more, and work out more. Problem is that sometimes I feel like I never really attain success because I am always improving. Yes, each year I am better at the things I love, but I can never look back and say “I achieved that this year.”

Clair Byrd
11 years ago
Reply to  takini8

Have you considered setting specific milestones for yourself?

Tony Jones
11 years ago

Dear Claire,

Putting trust in God Almighty and following His path will lead anyone to where they need to be, as no one knows what lies ahead, so why the constant stress of trying to figure the future out?

On the other hand generally, repetitive attempts to identify what lies ahead will continue regardless…

Weight from my perspective has and will always be attached to option one above…

Kind rgs,

TJ.

Eric Suesz
11 years ago
Reply to  Tony Jones

TJ, I definitely don’t plan on putting trust in God Almighty when it comes to 2013. I’ll stick to my resolutions of personal improvement.

Clair Byrd
11 years ago
Reply to  Tony Jones

Tony, thanks for your perspective and happy new year!

Dave Kotecki
Dave Kotecki
11 years ago

It’s easier to change everything all at once than it is to attempt to change one thing at a time. When everything changes you have no connection to the old and you won’t have time to wish the one area you were trying to change could be the way it was.

Clair Byrd
11 years ago
Reply to  Dave Kotecki

Interesting perspective, Dave! Thanks for sharing.

Otir
11 years ago

A young man once asked a wise old woman, “When is the best time to plant an oak tree?” She answered: “Twenty years ago.” He then asked, “When is the second best time?” She answered, ”Today.” The idea of New Beginnings, and new chances to rise above adversity is extremely motivating. Whether it be at the beginning of a secular year, shared by billions of individuals or after some specific personal time set up as “the new one” does not matter. Although it is clear that being in good company helps. Knowing that 88% of New Year’s resolutions fail let… Read more »

Clair Byrd
11 years ago
Reply to  Otir

That is a great goal, Otir. Happy new year!

Sean Grainger
11 years ago

Here’s my POV already written… I like the UnResolution idea http://www.seangrainger.com/2012/12/leaps-of-faith.html

Robert Tunmore
Robert Tunmore
11 years ago

Interesting – I read of the same research about the 88% – from Bristol Uni I think.
For 2013 I am taking a new approach to my New Year’s resolutions – “A mission a month”…

Clair Byrd
11 years ago
Reply to  Robert Tunmore

Robert, I’d love to hear more about your “A mission a month” plan. Would you mind sharing with me?

Anonymous
Anonymous
11 years ago

Clair, agree with you.Resolving to improve ourselves is certainly a goal worth achieving.

Clair Byrd
11 years ago
Reply to  Anonymous

Glad to hear it, thanks for reading and happy new year!

Anonymous
Anonymous
11 years ago
Reply to  Clair Byrd

Here’s to wishing you a healthy,happy and prosperous 2013.

ManAliss
ManAliss
11 years ago

Good morning and a Happy New Year 2013 from Greece Having read this article and being in education (Teacher of chemistry for 26 years) I believe I should always learn and improve myself in many different ways. That’s why I always put some targets ahead. Not necessarily big ones, but there is always a new task to do. It does not have to be a yearly plan or made in new year’s dawn. But it has to be something to keep me motivated and after succeeding it it gives me the power to put a new one ahead. This year’s… Read more »

rushes.infos
rushes.infos
11 years ago

Much ado about nothing…Happy new year.

Laura Brown
11 years ago

I’m working on the old standard for losing weight. But, I’m not focused on the weight but on how I exercise. Trying to work out in a way that doesn’t make me hate it.

Clair Byrd
11 years ago
Reply to  Laura Brown

I share the same problem.. going to a gym is so painful. I’ve discovered alternate ways, for me, it’s dancing salsa and bachata! You should give it a shot if you haven’t. 🙂

Lía Goren
Lía Goren
11 years ago

¡Excelente post! Justo a la medida de lo que estaba planteándome este año: focalizar en lugar de dispersar mis esfuerzos. Este post lo ha expresado de manera profunda y bella. Gracias!!

Clair Byrd
11 years ago
Reply to  Lía Goren

You are so welcome! I’m glad you found inspiration and value in this post.

Aurore Abi Nader Beaini

Wise vision, to build on in 2013

Clair Byrd
11 years ago

Thank you!

Béatrice Dupriez
Béatrice Dupriez
11 years ago

Thank you for your inspiring post. This year, I will try to have a deeper experience of things instead of many experiences. Happy 2013 to all of you.

Clair Byrd
11 years ago

Glad to hear you were a little inspired and I’m excited for the experiences you will have in 2013. 🙂

abdelhamidnacer
11 years ago

Thank you for sharing and happy new year 2013.

Clair Byrd
11 years ago

Thanks so much for reading and happy new year to you!

Katherine Collmer
Katherine Collmer
11 years ago

Clair, I resolve to develop! I love that line! I have been embarking on the road to realizing a dream come true for me (owning my own business) and I am looking forward to 2013 as the year to continue to develop that pursuit! Your blog is inspiring and I plan to share it with my readers! Thanks!

mom
mom
11 years ago

well written baby girl. i had no problems with font.

Johanaa Arredondo
11 years ago

Excelente información para reflexionar sobre lo que queremos hacer. Porque actuamos de acuerdo a lo que le gusta al resto de las personas, y no de acuerdo a lo que nosotros queremos realizar.

Jessica Estrada Mejia
11 years ago

Muy buena información, no me había puesto a pensar todo lo que logre en el 2012 y ahora si a cumplir mis propositos y metas este 2013.

Tony Terragna
11 years ago

Thanks for sharing!

Sakis Koukouvis
Sakis Koukouvis
11 years ago

Thank you Clair. I wish the best for the Scoop.it team

Clair Byrd
11 years ago

You are so welcome. Happy new year!

Sieg Holle
Sieg Holle
11 years ago

Well thought out Nudge to make something happen using your own free will. thanks -a happy and prosperous 2013 to you.

Clair Byrd
11 years ago
Reply to  Sieg Holle

Thanks Sieg! Glad you found value in this piece. Best of the year to you. 🙂

Terheck
Terheck
11 years ago

For 2013, I want to improve…myself 😉

Clair Byrd
11 years ago
Reply to  Terheck

Great! Best of luck in 2013!

Diane Wright
11 years ago

I hope to rekindle some of my past talents that I have allowed to lapse. It can be a case of use it or loose it but with the right focus I am sure some of my more creative talents will return. So can yours – or new ones you have not discovered yet.

Clair Byrd
11 years ago
Reply to  Diane Wright

Diane, glad to hear you are revisiting talents of your past. Would love to know more.. care to share? 🙂

Sharla
Sharla
11 years ago

Scoop.It has been a great addition and looking forward to many, many more Scoops in 2013! Upon reflecting on your article, unfortunately i have felt most of my past resolutions were made only to be broken, which is inherent to human nature. This year I resolve. . .http://catnipoflife.wordpress.com/2012/12/28/free-write-friday-14-resolve/ I do hope you visit catnip and the links to other writings. Happy New Year! “See” you in 2013!

Clair Byrd
11 years ago
Reply to  Sharla

Glad to hear you are taking a new look at how to create resolutions, Sharla. Best of luck with your efforts in 2013.

Leonardo Martins
11 years ago

Cool Clair! Enormous and great 2013!!! Thanks -> Leo

Clair Byrd
11 years ago

Thanks for reading Leonardo and happy new year to you!

eric roberts
eric roberts
11 years ago

hi it took a long time to get there but you are right in what you say. I am fed up with shooting off at tangents i am going to concentrate on a few things this coming year,similar to what you suggest. Happy new Year to you and the Scoopit team Eric Roberts

Clair Byrd
11 years ago
Reply to  eric roberts

Awesome to hear, thanks for reading and best of luck in 2013. 🙂

Richard Parslow
Richard Parslow
11 years ago

It’s not so much about ‘willpower’; it’s more to do with defining worthwhile, SMART goals and planning how to achieve them. Neuroscience also tells us that our goals are our most powerful motivators. When you define a goal, you form a mental image of what the world will be like when you achieve that goal. As you work, you continually compare the current world-state to the internal model: when there is a match you receive an endorphin boost – a direct pleasure response in the brain. As professional athletes and coaches we know the importance of using a goal-oriented approach… Read more »

Clair Byrd
11 years ago

Wow, great thoughts Richard. Love what you have to say.. and while I haven’t personally experienced Goalscape, I’m sure it is a lovely tool to help people set and achieve goals.

Tracey
Tracey
11 years ago

Just as a point of reference, the selected font is difficult to read. You may want to make it darker.

Clair Byrd
11 years ago
Reply to  Tracey

Hi Tracey! I’m so sorry you had trouble with the font — can you tell me a bit more? The way it displays for me is normal black on white. -Clair

Michal Sadowski
11 years ago

The problem is not laziness. The real problem is abundance and distraction it brings along. We can go to so many places, pursue so many different avenues, consume so much mind-blowing content that we keep dropping the ball.

And picking up a new one.

And dropping it.

And so on.

My resolution for 2013 is to make things come together more and allow myself to get pulled in all kinds of directions less.

eisde
eisde
11 years ago

I like it! for me this is done by living in the moment more, seeking God more and generally sloowing down and being more delebert in what I Do DO!

Clair Byrd
11 years ago

Really interesting perspective, Michal. Have you discovered anything that is helpful for preventing this distraction and being pulled in many different directions? I’d love to share your thoughts with the community here.

Michal Sadowski
11 years ago
Reply to  Clair Byrd

I find insight meditation a great help (here’s a free guide I use to move ahead in practice: http://www.urbandharma.org/pdf/mindfulness_in_plain_english.pdf

Other than that:
– seek focus in everything you do
– engage in one thing at a time, try to multi-task as little as possible
– don’t set too many goals but seek to get better at everything you do
– avoid common distractions (email, TV, texting), especially while working

VanAllen
VanAllen
11 years ago

Thanks Clair for Scoop and your work. Thanks for your thoughts with which I tend to agree and for this reason I have never set out to make specific and probably, for me, unrealistic NY resolutions but have rather had a feeling that I should improve on what I know I can already do or have done. I don’t like setting myself up for failure!!

Clair Byrd
11 years ago
Reply to  VanAllen

Good thoughts! Thank you for reading and happy new year.

Cheryl A.
Cheryl A.
11 years ago

I’m a passionate believer in life-long learning and feel that the blog makes a strong point when it states that additional knowledge doesn’t always mean learning different things. New learning can mean developing greater expertise whether it is improving one’s level of mastery of an existing skill or increasing understanding of a concept. May your New Year be bright!

Clair Byrd
11 years ago
Reply to  Cheryl A.

Totally agree, Cheryl. Thanks for weighing in with your opinion and happiest of new year’s to you. 🙂

Ed Burckhardt
Ed Burckhardt
11 years ago

Great article Clair, on my way to becoming “amazing at 3 things I love”. Have a great New Year!

Clair Byrd
11 years ago
Reply to  Ed Burckhardt

So glad to hear it, Ed. Best of luck in 2013.

takini8
takini8
11 years ago

My resolutions are always the same- read more, write more, and work out more. Problem is that sometimes I feel like I never really attain success because I am always improving. Yes, each year I am better at the things I love, but I can never look back and say “I achieved that this year.”

Clair Byrd
11 years ago
Reply to  takini8

Have you considered setting specific milestones for yourself?

Tony Jones
11 years ago

Dear Claire,

Putting trust in God Almighty and following His path will lead anyone to where they need to be, as no one knows what lies ahead, so why the constant stress of trying to figure the future out?

On the other hand generally, repetitive attempts to identify what lies ahead will continue regardless…

Weight from my perspective has and will always be attached to option one above…

Kind rgs,

TJ.

Eric Suesz
11 years ago
Reply to  Tony Jones

TJ, I definitely don’t plan on putting trust in God Almighty when it comes to 2013. I’ll stick to my resolutions of personal improvement.

Clair Byrd
11 years ago
Reply to  Tony Jones

Tony, thanks for your perspective and happy new year!

Dave Kotecki
Dave Kotecki
11 years ago

It’s easier to change everything all at once than it is to attempt to change one thing at a time. When everything changes you have no connection to the old and you won’t have time to wish the one area you were trying to change could be the way it was.

Clair Byrd
11 years ago
Reply to  Dave Kotecki

Interesting perspective, Dave! Thanks for sharing.

Otir
11 years ago

A young man once asked a wise old woman, “When is the best time to plant an oak tree?” She answered: “Twenty years ago.” He then asked, “When is the second best time?” She answered, ”Today.” The idea of New Beginnings, and new chances to rise above adversity is extremely motivating. Whether it be at the beginning of a secular year, shared by billions of individuals or after some specific personal time set up as “the new one” does not matter. Although it is clear that being in good company helps. Knowing that 88% of New Year’s resolutions fail let… Read more »

Clair Byrd
11 years ago
Reply to  Otir

That is a great goal, Otir. Happy new year!

Sean Grainger
11 years ago

Here’s my POV already written… I like the UnResolution idea http://www.seangrainger.com/2012/12/leaps-of-faith.html

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